konans papercrane and fox
by naruto-scientist
Summary: ; my first fanfic please be gentle naruto x konan kakashi torture good tobi torture
1. Chapter 1

ok all. i know my typing and gramer skills suck and that it looks really blocky but if you like the story it shouldnt matter so no complaining ^^ thank you and please enjoy

=.= reviews are nice sometimes ... they are worthy of a few nickles

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Konan sighed "I'm sick of this shit" she had just been given her first mission for a long time but she really didn't like the timing "they really don't understand women none of them" speaking to herself like she always did when she needed to work something out of her system. Then she heard it the one voice the voice that pissed her off more than all the others

"KONAN CHAN!" said one orange masked ninja "I HAS CREAM SODA"

Konan spent four seconds on that thought before saying "FUCK THIS" and locking herself in her room deciding it was time for Akatsuki to find out how SHE felt

Meanwhile two days latter in konoha

Naruto having won a free meal at Ichiraku ramen from Kakashi-sensei, is sitting and enjoying his meal unaware of his blue haired watcher.

Kakashi turned to Naruto and smiled his masked smile saying "good job training today Naruto just remember wind makes fire stronger" patting his charge on the shoulder

Naruto grins his always happy smile "THANKS KAKASHI SENSEI! I TOLD YOU I COULD DO IT! BELEIVE IT!!!" taking another bite of ramen as a blue gust of wind hit them taking Naruto and leaving human size Naruto doll.

Kakashi smiles and pats him on the shoulder again when the wind stopped saying "sure whatever Naruto" the doll fell over Kakashi stares at it blinking once then standing fast and shouting "I KILLED NARUTO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" shaking a fist to the air

Meanwhile with Konan

Naruto makes noise in the knapsack he had been thrown into making Konan hit him in the head again knocking him out laughing evilly. Her new devious plan to get back at Akatsuki was now in motion.

A few hours latter after she was sure no one was fallowing she dropped the blond boy on the floor kicking him to wake him up "HAY BAKA." She said her voice loud enough to wake a hibernating bear.

Naruto gasps awake and in pain hearing someone call him an idiot he says "FUCK YOU" not yet knowing who is assailant was.

Konan grins saying "ok I guess ill just give you to Itachi then fox"

Naruto understanding the threat shuts up and resists his urge to say "I'll escape BELEIVE IT!!!"

Konan appreciating the relief of this baka's catch phrase says "ok now that you have shut up I have a deal for you"

Naruto now intrigued says "why should I deal with Akatsuki"

Konan smirks and says "well for one I can make them stop hunting you and two because you will get to learn a new jutsu no charge"

Naruto gapes surprised "and what do you get in return?"

Konan smiles a rather unnaturally fox like smile and says "payback"


	2. Chapter 2

Meanwhile in konoha

Kakashi roams the streets slowly weeping over Naruto's body "I can't believe he is gone I mean he was always a knuckle head but things always looked better when he was around" walking even slower now to the Hokages office.

Back with Naruto and Konan

Naruto gapes saying "whaaaaaaat!" in a long exaggerated manor surprised at Konan's request. "WHY WOULD I TEACH YOU MY SECRET JUTSU" shrugging he says "besides what use would the sexy jutsu be to a woman it can't turn you into a man"

Konan nods saying "I know it's not for me I'm merely going to expand on your work"

Naruto blinks in confusion and says "and what do I get in return other than Akatsuki leaving me alone?"

Konan smiles and says "ill teach you a curse jutsu to use on your enemies"

Naruto sighs the alternative wasn't good either but oh well at least he got something out of the deal "ok fine ill teach you the sexy jutsu but I don't see what use it is to you" he grins thinking of a new prank and says "but first I have something I want to do" summoning two shadow clones one of which transformed into Naruto's rival Sasuke and they both ran off

An hour latter in Konoha

Kakashi sighs turning into an alley then he gasps seeing the last person he had expected to see "Naruto?" he said confused but then he heard noises and groans looking at the other he gasps "SASUKE?!" and runs from the ally screaming like a little girl finding a crevice to hide in and eventually falling asleep

Back with Konan and Naruto

Naruto grins and says "well you already know how to transform the only difference between them is I use more chakra and different hand signs but the idea is the same" performing the hand-signs Naruto says "**Hitsuji, Ushi, Tora**"

Konan performs the hand-signs although slower than Naruto and applies the chakra creating a large poof Naruto stares dumfounded drooling as he sees the clouds disperse

Konan frowns and says "what?"

Naruto chuckles like Jaraiya would seeing a naked woman and says "I think you have the jutsu down"

Konan frowns and says "what's with the look?" looking down at herself and realizing she was standing naked before the boy blushing slightly she growls and hits him in the head shouting "PERVERT!!!" putting him flat on his ass out cold Konan sighs and releases the jutsu "you disserve that you perv"

Meanwhile in Konoha

Anko whistles a happy tune before spotting something and deciding to take a closer look "Kakashi?" she said in confusion before an idea came to her head she grins and picks the lone jonnin up before poofing away to her apartment


	3. Authors Note

=.= ok I know I'm not that good of an author ok those of you that read my stories and like them though please do me a favor VISIT my profile once in a while I sometimes have important information about the story there OR I need my fans OPINIONS on where to take it and O NO FLAMING ME JUST BECOUSE OF THIS AUTHORS NOTE

^W^ ok now that that's over with im saving the next chapter for a while longer as I still need to write quite a bit more to stay ahead of demand


	4. Chapter 3

A day later with Konan and Naruto

Naruto yawns after a day of training with Konan he found she really wasn't that bad of a person in fact Naruto thought that she was rather pretty despite her constant unhappiness

Konan smiles and says "hay baka what's your name?" having not slept that night so she could work on her new jutsu

Naruto frowns tired of being called baka all the time he says "I'm Naruto" deciding that his mask was to tiring to wear today "Naruto Uzumaki" in a serous tone

Konan noticing the change in tone and the way Naruto was holding himself suddenly gave her the urge to comfort him but she resisted thinking _'I'm Akatsuki I'm not supposed to feel sorry for this whelp he is the nine tailed fox nothing more nothing less' _"well Naruto now its my turn to teach you in return the jutsu I'm going to teach you is called the sexy curse jutsu" showing him the hand signs and saying "**u, tatsu, Hitsuji, Ushi, Tora, Saru, Tori, Ne**" putting her stoic mask back on. "It is a curse jutsu so we need a test subject lets go to Konoha" making her voice emotionless

Naruto grins already having the perfect test subject in mind

Meanwhile in Konoha

Kakashi poofs out of Anko's house, and runs through the streets naked screaming "RAAAAAPE!!!!!" running around like a mad man after about an hour of running around he finds some clothes and then walks to a building with a for sale sign on it buying it before continuing his mad run

Meanwhile at the Uchiha manor

Sasuke sighs today had been a long uneventful day Kakashi had skipped out on training … AGAIN and Sakura wouldn't stop pestering him. At this very moment she was pounding on his door begging to be let in. after sharpening all his kunai he heard a poof and the sound of a shuriken as one of his traps where triggered. Looking up he sees a grinning idiot

"HAY DOPE GET OUTA MY HOUSE" Sasuke yelled before feeling a pinching sensation on his shoulder and screaming in pain

"_**sexy curse jutsu**_" said one grinning dobe as his shadow clone undid all the traps and locks letting Sakura in after Naruto poofed away

Sakura hearing the click of the door unlocking and a poof walks in to see Sasuke on the floor looking passed out

Sasuke stands his usual stoic expression on his face seeing Sakura he grunts his hello

Sakura stands there gapping for a moment before saying "SASUKE WHY DO YOU HAVE BOOBS!!!"

Sasuke realizing the change in his body blushes for three seconds before throwing three kunai one into Sakura's heart one her head and the third her liver for good measure. Killing her before the evidence could get away. Then he threw her into a freezer for latter disposal before locking his door again.


	5. STOLEN KEYBOARD

=.= ok this is an important note from the author I have lost my mojo and need your help to find it please respond to my poll so that the story may get back on track

scencerily person with the keyboard

p.s. I was lazy so I hired someone to type this for me as I told them what to type (aka dictation)

personal notice from dictator: This guy can be a hyperactive idiot sometime so please be kind to him. It is not his fault and I'm sure there are more then a few idiots reading this. I mean. Come on. This is very perverted that can only come from a very … (insert word) mind. So be kind, review and rememeber what it is like to be ani idiot.

EMPOWERED FOR THE WIN!! And the Doctor. And Team Shep. And Jack Frost.

…

Live Long and Prosper,

The Real Person With the Keyboard ((AKA FatesMyBitch))


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